When you and your loved one’s are not getting along so well, wouldn’t it be nice to be able to pull out a blueprint for how to get things back on track?
I mean, we all know each other’s buttons right? The folks you love MOST in this world all know exactly what to do that sends you flying off the handle. They have THAT blueprint ready at a moment’s notice, yeah? Well I’m gonna tell you how you can have the opposite blueprint ready too.
Ready for the secret to that?
1. Begin a daily habit of noticing & telling each other every single time things are done that you like & appreciate, & then telling each other why you like and appreciated it.
2. Remember what they tell you cause THAT is your blueprint.
It sounds simple, but it is absolutely effective.
A couple of weeks ago, my fiancee told me that when I get home, she loves it when I immediately give her a kiss on the cheek. To her, that little kiss says “Hi, I love you, & I’m glad to be home with you.” Even if I’m on the phone when I give it to her, (which I frequently am.)
So now, no matter what kind of day we’ve both had, or how much I still have to do when I get home, I have a tiny little piece of ammo ready every single day, that is sure to help us both be in a better place with each other. And I only have it, because she told me what it means to her.
So go…share the good stuff, tell your loved one’s what they do well to feed your relationship, and ask them for that info too.
Then you’ll have your blueprint, ready for even the toughest road ahead.
No hardhat needed,
Rebekka Ouer, LCSW