The Blog

My experiment with gratitude

Recently, my 2 officemates and I started writing down 3 gratitudes a day on a whiteboard we share in our file-room.  There is research out there that says doing this is helpful for your mood, & I was curious about that. So as I started to write things down every...

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Mining For Good

Which 5 living beings know you best? I say living beings, because I mean for you to consider your pets as well, if you think they are candidates. So, think for a minute about the one that knows you best in this world, and then decide on the next few as well.I wonder,...

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In the meantime…

So often, when a 'goal' is incredibly far away, we can get bogged down with the waiting and feel like until we reach that place, we just have deal with feeling miserable. But if we think about it a minute, it's simply not true. We can have fun, and enjoy a day or even...

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Regarding Heartbreak…

One of the most difficult things that life routinely throws at us, is heartbreak. And for those of us who identify as gay or lesbian, it might hit us much later in life than it does for others. Time after time I see an individual going through a break up in my therapy...

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Perspective

Some of the most amazing, wise, intelligent & warm people I know, are those that have been through some of the toughest things life has to offer.  I think that perspective is a huge part of why those people are able to be so evolved.  I had a headache today, and...

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When coming out is especially hard

Ask yourself these questions about the people you’re thinking of coming out to, then answer them honestly, thoughtfully & thoroughly, After each and every question ask yourself  “What else?” Until you literally can’t think of anything else to add to that...

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Arm yourself

Think about the last time life was incredibly tough, you know, one of those times when you remember waking up one day and feeling normal, and thinking about how grateful you are for just feeling normal again.  Somehow, you got through that super tough time, and...

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List It

Think about your current biggest problem, whether it's something specific to you, your career, your family, your relationship...whatever it is that's nagging at you most. Now, make a list of 30-50 signs that this problem was solved in a way that is right for you. This...

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With the gay and lesbian couples I see, some weeks it seems like I hear a LOT about things not being ‘good enough’, even though there is REMARKABLE progress to report. It’s a kind of glass-half-empty sentiment that is very natural for a lot of people…just seeing the...

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About Me

I am a solution-focused therapist and author of the book, Solution Focused Brief Therapy with the LGBT Community: Creating Futures through Hope and Resilience from Routledge Publications.

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